First Post

I have never been good at journaling but I decided to give blogging a try. Maybe this will help me get my feelings, thoughts and frustrations out. Maybe people will understand more what I am going through. Maybe I can figure out the way my path of life should be. I have a couple of goals for my life.

1) Get the most of life even though I was recently diagnosed with Lupus. I have it pretty much under control right now except when things like a stressful phone call happens. My family and my friends and my church family are helping me out right now and I really appreciate that. I go to church on Sundays. Isabelle loves going to the nursery!! Even though she misses her morning "rest" time. Nursery is way too exciting to take a rest unless you are really, really, really, tired out and then you can have some cuddle time with some nursery volunteers that you really like. I go to an exercise class on Mondays. Isabelle gets to play with her grandparents and then have them put her to bed while I am at the YMCA. My parents make sure I get to where I need to go since I don't have a car or a license right now though at some point I would like to fix that. I really like my exercise class because it gives me some stress relief and it gives me a chance to strengthen my mussel. On Tuesdays, I go play with Isabelle at the YMCA in the gymnastics center for the preschool open gym. She has a lot of fun and it is really fun to play with her!!! Isabelle and I are going to try out a playgroup tomorrow morning. That should be fun. On those Thursday nights, I go to a women's Bible Study at church. I really like going. For one thing, they make me laugh!!! It is good to have a time where you can laugh when not everything in your life is not going the way it should. They give a lot of moral support and prayer support. They make sure that I have a ride to Bible Study and a ride back. I really appreciate this. I get to talk about things and get some feedback from them. It helps me to deal with issues. On Fridays, usually my Dad and I take Isabelle to Baby Bookworms at the library. Isabelle loves books and music!!!!! Although right now they are having a little break so I think we might visit my Nana and Papa who only live about 15 minutes away. On Saturdays, Isabelle and I have a swim class and then my dad takes her home. Right now, my best friend, Tina meets me for some lap swimming and then we usually go out for a bite to eat and then either do some errands that we both need to do or go watch a movie at her appointment with her. If I don't have a really busy week or a really stressful week, I might even get in an exercise video or two. I also do some pt exercises at night as long as I haven't had a really stressful day. All those things keep me healthy. In the fall, I couldn't even walk the mall and when I went to the Topsfield fair in October, I barely could get back to the car. I couldn't even get in and out of the bathtub without being in pain. I also have a prescription that helps out with the mechanical issues of my knees.

2) I want my marriage to be in a better place. I need my husband to get a job and be able to take care of the three of us. Right now Isabelle and I are with my parents in MA. He is still in NY. I miss him and love him. I like it when he holds me tight as I fall asleep. It makes me feel loved.

3) I want to continue to live in MA for the time being. I know that I am loved and well cared for. I go to a church that supports me. I like how my primary care Dr. is right down the street. And he is Christian who goes to my church. It is nice to have medical care from a Christian perspective. My ruematolgist is not very far aways so it is easy to get a ride there and someone doesn't have to be babysitting Isabelle for very long. It is also nice that an emergency room isn't very far away either.